Alyssa Milano still can’t seem to get over Ted Nugent’s little Golden Globes prank. According to sources, he showed up at her after-party with Kid Rock and turned a boring elitist nightmare into an actual rockin’ good time.

Milano spent the evening in her bedroom crying on Instagram about the ordeal. The next day, she tried to file a lawsuit against the rocker for ruining her party, but was told by her lawyers she didn’t have a case.

Since then, according to Nugent, Milano has engaged in a campaign of stalking and bullying not only online but in real life. “She’s in my inbox 500 times a day,” he said, “she’s like some kind of possessed crazy person.”

Nugent acknowledged that it was his actions that started the whole thing, but insists it was all in good fun. “I thought we were friends,” he said, “she sends me Christmas cards.”

Milano’s spokesman, Joe Barron, says Nugent is completely miscategorizing the messages and has no right to call her a stalker. “Those Christmas cards all had obscenities written in human feces on them,” he said, “Alyssa has always despised this pile of trash.”

Nugent said Milano’s turds smell like roses and that he’ll continue to display the cards proudly. “I’m moving them to the bedroom,” he said, “where they’ll be of much more use.”

Milano says her campaign to expose Ted Nugent as an abhorrent human being will “never end.” Good luck with that, princess. God Bless America.

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